Right.
So.
I'm gathering up the nerve to write this down. *deep breath* Bear with me. I will ramble at times, will probably even bore you. But you can leave at any time. I won't mind. It's just that I usually prattle on and on about how I can never write down what I really feel, and then I feel stupid about actually admitting that when other people can. I figure I better start now, because, well if not now, when?

Let me quote Sarah B. on my opening: A few years ago, I fell in love: the real eye-opening, head over heels, I-had-no-idea-it-could-be-like-this kind of love. When I didn't expect it; when I didn't even know if it was love. It was more like a heady kind of like/lust thing. The kind where anything and everything makes you think of him. It was nice. I've never felt that way about anyone or anything before, it gave me something to look forward to everyday. Every conversation with him was bliss and everytime I had to say goodbye was torture. I mean, I knew there'd be tomorrow, but all I could think about was the space of time between now and the next time that didn't have him in it.

Naturally, the normalness that your life was turned upside down. Friends get bored, family gets annoyed, pets walk out on you - but it's ok because there's HIM, there's YOU, there's "US".

And of course, the moment you begin thinking that way, things are bound to go down the toilet.

Because my brain and emotions didn't know any better, I didn't know how to handle the entire thing. I got too clingy. All of a sudden, it wasn't enough.

*I'll continue this next time.*
** Thank you, Sarah B. for the idea.**

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